There was a time when I would try to forget you,
in my mind where I was immaturely and improperly raised.
I was the pupil in my head, in a school of no rules.
I was also the teacher, the principal
my mother, my father – my god.
Tearing book pages like flower petals.
“Comply I will” or “Comply I will not”
And as they fell to become nothing but forgotten memories in the dust,
I understood the bitter smell of fallen lilacs, watching them slip away from beauty.
Yet I did nothing to try in revitalize what a true god created.
Decisions being deciphered by a child with a delusional sense of being a man.
I could pray to my crucifix and receive redemption,
while burning my Jesus piece in a barrel of no regrets
and do all this with a pure mind and clear conscious.
I was able to break hearts and forgot the past where broken hearts forget the misery.
I was a god, a teacher.
A preacher to audience of many (if many meant every personality I portrayed)
I needed glory to make my existence justified, yet I glorified the injustice of every person I hurt
I needed a jolt of power.
I needed to be in charge.
I needed to be God.
Levi J. Mericle is a poet/spoken-word artist and lyricist from Tucumcari, N.M. Currently he is associated with the New Mexico State Poetry Society and gives readings from his work. His work has appeared in multiple anthologies and his work can also be seen in multiple lit magazines and journals such as, Black Heart Magazine, The Mused, 101 Words, Eunoia Review, Awakenings Review, Penhead Press, Zaira Journal etc. Levi spends his days daydreaming about poetry and writes, at least a little bit every single day no matter what.